Being Deaf within Hearing Groups

It was almost a last minute decision to fly out to Tucson, AZ to spend the holiday weekend with my college roommate Grace. They are constantly telling us to come out to visit them and we try to at least once a year. John was supposed to go with me but that didn't work out so my 13 yr old daughter went with me instead. We are blessed to be able to fly free as John is an employee of Delta airlines.

Grace knows a limited amount of sign language but she is one of those I normally have no problems lipreading so I'm comfortable being around her and we have a good time together. Her husband, Charlie is a little harder to lipread but I can manage. If necessary, Kayla will interpret what they say if I get stuck. It works out.

They have 9 horses on their mini ranch so I got to go horseback riding twice. My horse, "Chief", is so patience and tolerant of my inexperience. Kayla enjoyed riding "Ben" and she does a good job.

While we had a super relaxing weekend with Grace and Charlie, there were a few testing, stressful moments for me - all of which involved groups.

I do not do well in hearing groups. Put me with 3 or more people who do not sign and I'm lost. I am not able to follow conversations that bounce back and forth as the subject matter keeps changing...people don't keep their bodies in my line of sight...people are laughing and its pretty much impossible to lipread talking while they are laughing or smiling big... people are not looking directly at me... the lighting is not good... mustaches and beards (ugh... a deaf person's nightmare)...etc etc.

The first happened Saturday night when we attended an Open House for a friend's son who graduated. That was not too bad as that was also my first evening with Grace so it was our first chance to catch up with each other so we mostly sat at a table and chatted the whole time. I am pretty good with a one to one conversation as long as I know the subject we are discussing.

The next occasion was church on Sunday. They normally have an interpreter. I was there before with an interpreter so we all expected the same... except the interpreter did not show up. ugh... that meant I had to sit there for an hour and attempt to lipread everything. Not good. My lipreading skills are no longer as good as they once were. Since I learned ASL and spend most of my time around Deaf people, I don't depend on lipreading as much as I once did growing up. When I am sitting "deaf" within a hearing group, I tend to have "pity parties" for myself.

I hate that and I struggle with that. I really should have stopped feeling sorry for myself and just had a private worship and ignored what was going on around me but I have a hard time doing that. I tried SO HARD to lipread the pastor and it frustrated me so much that I had no idea what he was saying. I'm curious if any of the readers also feel this way. I spent more time trying to hold back tears than anything else.

The third occasion was Memorial day when Grace had 2 other couples over for a BBQ. I had met these people during previous visits with Grace so I knew who they were but never really related to them. We all sat around the table and the conversation just bounced from one thing to another. Grace would occasionally voice interpret what someone said. As long as she was talking directly to me, I could understand her. It was interesting to note that my daughter who was also there and knows sign very well, did not attempt to interpret except if I couldn't understand Grace. I never asked her to and would never put her into that position. That would have to be her choice. Just because she is a CODA, doesn't mean she is my personal interpreter. Perhaps when she gets older, she will feel more comfortable. That is fine.

I might be seeing these very same people again next month as we were invited to join them when they travel to Mexico and stay at their summer house on the beach. This time John is coming with us. While I won't force him to be my personal interpreter, I know he will be willing and I'm looking forward to the chance to get to know Grace's friends better as they are all very nice people.

Overall it was a very nice weekend and I'm glad I went. It forced me to take a break from work and do different things...even if sometimes they are out of my comfort zone!

God Gave Each of us an Angel

This is dedicated to all the moms out there! Hope you had a happy Mother's day and remember that EVERYDAY is Mother's Day and it is an honor to be a mom! Enjoy! If you doubleclick on the video, it will show up larger.

Vote for DOUA today!

Please Vote for Disabled Online Users Association. http://communicause.com/my-cause/1431/gwscY7DTmzrYLDgs

DOUA stands for Disabled Online Users Association. Its free for anyone who has any type of "disability" to join. No one judges you there. There are classes and forums where you can ask questions to help you get started with having a business on the internet. They have been a big encourager to me when I was struggling a few years ago. They are part of a contest to receive a $25,000 social media makeover. They deserve your support and your vote. GO and vote now! and many thanks!

Are you Spontanious? A Trip to Canada

Ever wake up and know you had the whole day as a clean slate... no appts... no plans....nothing that MUST be done that day? You are free to do as you want and then wonder... what DO I want to do today? Well.. this past weekend was such a day for our family. We had nothing planned at all. I was going to do the "usual" which is work on my eBay business. This is something I do everyday... no set hours but always have something I could be doing business related. Its actually rare for me to do something just for myself (like a hobby or such).

But anyways...Saturday we were bored. John did work some OT that morning 4am to 8am and did take a couple hours nap when he got home. About 10:30am, he asked me... want to go on an adventure? I said sure... I need to know what time we needed to leave the house as I was working on my shipping at that moment. He said ASAP. I said, ok.. give me 10 minutes to finish my shipping. I printed them off and he and our daughter taped the labels on the boxes while I changed my clothes, brushed my teeth and put together a bag with a book, mags, and my camera. We left the house in 10 minutes and headed to Bishop airport. I had no idea where we were going. I was just there for the ride. Unfortunately, we arrived too late. John was not aware that NW had pushed up their leaving time 20 minutes. We had just missed the cutoff time for loading.

Oh well.. back to the car and home again. Now what? We can't fly anywhere and didn't want to stay home and do the "usual" so what was left? A drive in the car! It was a very nice early spring day with the sun shining. I still didn't know where we were going but I did see John pull out our passports and our daughter's birth certificate. ummmm... We go east on I-69. We end up in Port Huron and then over the bridge into Canada. We are asked a few questions as far as where we were going (nowhere in particular) and how long we would be staying in Canada (just a few hours). That was it.

My daughter asked for the camera so these are her shots (I took one) of the day... In Canada we stop at the visitor center for a map and bathroom break. We decide to just head south and drive along St. Clair Lake. We passed several huge freighters on the lake. Its kinda boring on that side of the lake.


We go past several smelly oil refineries and rundown houses. I was saying to John... you would think the houses would be nicer as they have the lake view right in front of them. We drive until we hit the small town of Sombra.












This is where we end our Canadian drive and take the ferry back over to USA to Marine City. We are now "home" again as we once lived in this area and this is familiar to us. We stop at a Flea Market in Marine City and then drive along the shoreline until we hit the small town of New Baltimore. When we moved to MI from PA back in 1994, we lived in New Baltimore for 2 years before we moved to our current home in Flint.

Of course we had to stop by our old neighborhood and see if our old house was still there. IT WAS! and its for sale again! LOL. It was a nice house. It is a doublewide home. I loved the layout and large rooms but space was limited and no basement, etc made it hard. I also did not like how close the houses are. When I did the dishes, I could look into my neighbors living room. I would be very curious to see what it looks like inside now.

It was interesting driving through the town and remembering what was there before and what has changed. We checked out the church we used to attend and the elementary school our oldest attended. We checked out the beach we used to take the kids several times a week. They have a nice play-scape there now. We decided to stop for supper here and went to Ponchos which is a REAL Mexican restaurant... not Taco Bell!

We then headed up north and arrived home again about 7:30ish. So... that how we spent this past Saturday... being spontaneous!

Now this morning I got a text from John saying... do we have any plans for this Saturday? Are you up to leaving the house EARLY and arriving home LATE? Sure! Looks like another day of being spontaneous and just going "for the ride"! Who knows where we will end up!

Hero Video by Kirk Franklin

A friend of mine sent me this video called HERO by Kirk Franklin. It was performed live at her church in Columbus, Ohio on Easter Sunday.

While I can't actually hear the music, I can sing along by reading the words.

YES! Jesus is my hero
YES! He saves and He saved the Day!

Enjoy